“Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the king…” how I wish, I could see that well and know! I have learned to use other means to see because my eyes are not always realiable. We don’t just ‘see’ with our eyes, we also balance. One reason I am often off-balanced is because I have to learn how to center my body without using my eyes. In therapy I am often told shut my eyes and rely on my brain. My eyes see strange lights, they often close, they bob open and shut often. Before my surgery my site was SO much better and I remember telling one of my doctors not to let my eyes go. However, they did. It took them a LONG time to reattach to my brain and even now, after almost 3 years, they still struggle to being fully connected. Some days I have little to no problems, others, much like today, i just want to go back to sleep.
God reminds me often that it is not my eyes I need to focus on Him, it is my heart. However, I am the first to tell you, that is harder than He asks! I just want to be able to enjoy sight again, I would like to drive again, I would like to not have to figure out what things say without glasses. Then my mind wanders to my youngest daughter. When she was a baby she had meningitis and RSV back to back. The doctors told us that her body may not grow as fast as her peers because both of these sicknesses will stump her growth and may cause issues in the long run. My youngest daugther is only 5 feet and she is the smallest of everyone. When she was about 13 we took her to the eye doctors because she was complaining she couldn’t see the board. Both my husband and I had 20/20 vision so it seemed odd. When they looked her over they found out that she has severe seeing issues probably related to her sicknesses as a baby. Then it came, “her eyes will only get worse the older she gets.” No matter how much we prayed for her, we could not help her. I remember praying one night and God told me, “I want her to find me with her heart.” Now, I understand what He was saying. As a young child she always told us that God was good and great because he created the world so beautiful around her. Now, she rarely says anything positive about God and she can barely see without her glasses. I know that one day, she will see God without her eyes.
I admit it is hard to see God through sound, especially when I hear more cussing and screaming. It is difficult to hear God in the birds or creatures because I often hear the city cars or buzzing lights. The only time I am able to understand God is when listening to his scriptures or sitting in a quiet room and praying. I am often praying that I can hear God with my heart more often and that is my prayer request for you too.
Romans 10:9-10 “…because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and belive in your hearth that God raised him from the dead, you will b saved. For with the heart, one believes and is justified and with the mouth one confesses and is saved. “
2 Timothy 3:16, ‘all scripture is breathed out by God…”